Highlights of the week

Trump Dance !?! I am still working on the Hamster Dance. Listen to the end.

ITEM 1: The Insider reported, “Russian schoolchildren handed Kalashnikov rifles in class in honor of the weapons designer’s 105th birthday.”

Let’s pass out Tommy guns to OUR children on December 31 in honor of the birth of the gun’s inventor, General John Taliaferro Thompson.

ITEM 2: Eric Daugherty tweeted, “JUST IN: Arizona finished counting votes.”

We can now say officially that Goldwater carried Arizona over LBJ.

ITEM 3: NYT reported (no links for communists), “Florida Man Accused of Plotting Attack on New York Stock Exchange.”

Florida Man? His name is Harun Abdul-Malik Yener. Florida Man? Some guy who was arrested for having sex with an alligator should sue NYT for defamation.

ITEM 4: The Wall Street Journal reported, “The dozen [Ivy League and elite] schools don’t produce enough high-quality graduates to keep up with Bain’s head count needs. And the firm has started conducting Zoom interviews where the interviewer doesn’t know the job candidate’s university affiliation.”

But the Ivy Leaguers protesting Israel will be the first called if Bain ever opens an office in Gaza.

ITEM 5: Silly humans. Your boycott of Tar-jay over Gay Pride Month will never work. Your children will be transed and you will like it.

CNBC reported, “Target shares plunge 20% after discounter cuts forecast, posts biggest earnings miss in two years.”

ITEM 6: Woke Spy reported, “Donald Trump Won A Jail Precinct Despite Losing by 94 Points in 2020.”

Jail inmates can vote in Chicago. They now see the convicted felon as one of them.

ITEM 7: The Guardian got drunk and said, “Is this (finally) the end for X? Delicate Musk-Trump relationship and growing rivals spell trouble for platform.

“The former Twitter could fade away, or help shape a dark future hosting voices of a new authoritarian world.”

Stop it, Elon Musk. Voicing an authoritarian world is the Guardian’s job.

ITEM 8: ABC reported, “Jussie Smollett's conviction in hoax attack overturned by state supreme court.”

Corruption so thick, you can Smollett.

ITEM 9: Jeff Bezos’s Post said, “Republican leaders, looking for ways to offset the cost of lower taxes, are considering changes to safety net programs for the poor.”

Only tax cuts have to be paid for. Spending never requires a cutback in anything, unless it is a wall.

ITEM 10: The story also said, “$160 billion in reduced costs could come from checking Medicaid eligibility more than once per year.”

Why aren’t we checking now?

ITEM 11: Zero Hedge reported, “Pronoun-Wielding Jaguar Boss Goes On Damage Control After Cringeworthy Woke Ad.”

Jaguar may not know how to sell new cars, but Aston Martin knows how to sell used ones.

ITEM 12: Dr. Eli David tweeted, “On October 7 Hamas committed one of the deadliest massacres in modern history. In response, today ICC issued arrest warrants for the Israeli prime minister and defense minister, and for a dead Hamas terrorist killed four months ago.”

Next up, an arrest warrant for Adolf Hitler.

ITEM 13: The European Conservative reported, “French TV Channel Fined for Calling Abortion the World’s Leading Cause of Death.”

The French follow our lead. Don’t think so? We’ve had open borders since the last immigration reform 38 years ago. The cancel culture has been around almost as long. We still arrest abortion protesters and give them long prison terms.

ITEM 14: Politico interviewed Democrat defense attorney Mark Zaid about possible indictments of those who politicized the government.

Zaid said, “There are a small number of people who I have told, ‘Look, you should take a vacation outside of the country around the time of inauguration, just to see what happens.’ Just go on a routine vacation and see what plays out come January 20th, 21st, 22nd.”

I hear Angola is nice this time of year — and it has no extradition treaty with the USA.

ITEM 15: The Pennsylvania Supreme Court told Democrats to stop counting illegal ballots. Democrats ignored the court. Justices then explained to them how bench warrants work.

Democrats stopped. A sledgehammer to the snout is the best way to teach a jackass.

MEMO TO ELON AND VIVEK: You likely already know this, but don’t fire anyone. Eliminate their position instead.

Firing leads to long drawn-out litigation in which the civil servant runs out the clock until President Newsom or Adam Schiff takes office. Eliminating the position shouldn’t land you in court.

Deciding which jobs go first is easy. Wait for a snowstorm in DC. Say only essential workers should show up for work. The next day, eliminate the positions of everyone who stayed home.

ITEM 16: The New York Post reported, “Trump is already receiving intelligence briefings from his home at Mar-a-Lago.”

They are setting him up for another FBI raid, aren’t they?

ITEM 17: Dennis Kucinich tweeted, “No President has the right to use unilateral executive authority to permit a U.S. missile strike against another nation. It invites a retaliatory attack. It is an impeachable offense.

“Congress, as a co-equal branch of government, must act now.

“Any Member of Congress can, under privileges of the House, ask for immediate consideration of a joint resolution which invokes Article I, Section 8, and then cuts off all funding for personnel, coordination, technical advisers, materiel, equipment and deployment of ATACMS and emplacement of any other offensive missile systems in Ukraine.”

45 years after I voted against his re-election, I finally found something we agree on.

ITEM 18: Donald J. Trump News tweeted, “CDC employees are reportedly preparing to submit their resignation letters in large numbers following the announcement that RFK Jr. will head the Department of Health and Human Services.”

Oh no. If there is another virus, who will be there to give us the absolute worst advice possible?

ITEM 19: Matt Gaetz tweeted, “I had excellent meetings with Senators yesterday. I appreciate their thoughtful feedback — and the incredible support of so many. While the momentum was strong, it is clear that my confirmation was unfairly becoming a distraction to the critical work of the Trump/Vance Transition. There is no time to waste on a needlessly protracted Washington scuffle, thus I'll be withdrawing my name from consideration to serve as Attorney General. Trump's DOJ must be in place and ready on Day 1.”

Trump said OK, and nominated Pam Bondi. Good. She has a much better figure. Better eyebrows, too.

ITEM 20: Politico reported, “Nikki Haley, who was Trump’s most significant Republican primary opponent, argued on her radio show Wednesday against confirming Gabbard as director of national intelligence and Kennedy to lead Health and Human Services.”

She really, really wants that seat opening on The View.

ITEM 21: Collin Rugg tweeted, “Ellen DeGeneres has moved to Great Britain and says she is never coming back to the United States after Trump’s election win.”

Self-deportation saves the government billions.

ITEM 22: Take a look at Pam Bondi, 59; Nancy Mace, 46; Dr. Janette Nesheiwat, 48; Kristi Noem, 52; Megyn Kelly, 54; and Maye Musk, 76. The photos are all S4SS (Safe for Sunday School).

Support Trump and keep your good looks, ladies. Works better than Oil of Olay.

ITEM 23: The Daily Mail reported, “Elon Musk is more popular than Keir Starmer: PM’s net approval rating among British public is five points lower than billionaire Tesla owner, survey reveals.”

Head lice are more popular than Herr Starmer. He’s the Hillary of UK politics.

ITEM 24: End Wokeness tweeted with a video, “2 years since MSNBC predicted that Elon’s Twitter was on the brink of collapse.”

Now MSNBC is.

ITEM 25: Comcast may have a buyer.

Elon Musk tweeted, “How much does it cost?”

If this means Joy Reid and Joe Scarborough are headed to Mars, so be it.

ITEM 26: Robby Starbuck tweeted, “A Hospital in Duluth has apologized to their employees for serving them free Chick Fil A and called complaining employees courageous for speaking out against the chicken sandwiches. I wish I was joking but sadly, I’m not.”

And yet the hospital still serves devil’s food cake.

ITEM 27: Dan Scavino Jr. tweeted, “Just spoke to President Trump regarding Mike Rogers going to the FBI. It’s not happening — In his own words, ‘I have never even given it a thought.’ Not happening.”

Jack Poso replied, “I have heard people asking if Trump really said this or if Dan made it up. Let me tell you something. This is the man who picked the bloody hat up off the ground in Butler. There is no one more loyal in MAGA than Dan Scavino. Period.”

Forget a huckleberry, I want a Dan Scavino. Come to think of it, a Jack Poso would be pretty nice as well.

ITEM 28: Many libs left Twitter en masse this week for Bluesky.

Now there is a Libs of Bluesky account on Twitter. You can run but you cannot hide.

ITEM 29: Elon Musk’s America PAC tweeted, “The U.S. State Department held taxpayer-funded ‘therapy and listening sessions’ for government employees after Donald Trump’s 2024 election victory.”

It had to be aromatherapy because it stinks to high heaven.

ITEM 30: House Nerd Mike Johnson told reporters, “Let me be unequivocally clear. A man is a man and a woman is a woman. And a man cannot become a woman.”

Drag queen congressman, Tim “Sarah” McBride, will just have to take the decision like a man.

ITEM 31: Visegrad 24 tweeted, “The Democrat Mayor of Denver, Mike Johnston, has challenged Trump to try to deport any illegal migrants from his city, saying he would deploy the Denver City Police and volunteers from the local community to use force against federal forces trying to deport illegals.”

Johnston in December complained about Texas dumping illegal aliens in his town, “We, at this point now, have had more migrant arrivals to our city than any city in America per capita. And that is not because there is a thoughtful or coordinated strategy to entry. It is because we are the first big city north of El Paso — and the cheapest bus ticket and the shortest trip for the (Texas) governor and others who are trying to find a place to send people.”

Now he wants an insurrection.