133 Comments

Write in for the Ukrainian Anthem…

‘Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road’

Expand full comment

I apologize for not listing it. The cat is unfamiliar with the work of Loudon Wainwright III

Expand full comment

Tragic.

Expand full comment

Could we choose "My Bubblegum Loses Flavor on the Bedpost Overnight!" as the alternate? Or perhaps honor the recently deceased Tina Turner with "What's Love Got to do With It?"

Expand full comment

Great one!

Expand full comment

Re: Sotomayor…’The Wide Latina’ (thanks LuAnn)

“Timed right, her resignation could give conservative(s) a seventh Justice”…

You know when you think back to the RBG fiasco that led to Amy Barrett’s nomination and ascension, Progressive, Communist Female Justices may just be the gift that keeps on giving!

Expand full comment

Some people will cling to whatever power they can get for as long as they can. Those are not people I trust because they are not concerned about what their exercise of that power does to others.

Expand full comment

That sounds like McConnell and Schumer leading the pack.

Expand full comment

My thought was her replacement could be the 6 plus 1 conservative. Roberts floates too much be be called conservative

Expand full comment

Chief Justice Wind Sock – er, Chief Justice Roberts...

Expand full comment

Ha!

CJ Wind Sock.

Perfect description.

Expand full comment

I wish Rush could have heard that one. With him it was "their dampened finger pointing upward into the wind."

Expand full comment

I like to think we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses that includes Rush.

Expand full comment

That's true. Speaking of Rush, have you ever read anything his brother David has written. Early in Rush's TN show in my area, I remember Rush getting teary upon the birth of David's daughter. Rush advised us to ignore the Tree Huggers about climate, "We didn't make this earth and we can't break it."

Expand full comment

You're cracking me up over here! I had a long hard day at the beauty parlor and that was just for the estimate.

Expand full comment

Man! That's as cold as a Minnesota noreaster and as accurate as a Marine sniper.

Expand full comment

Why don’t we just call him Gay, tell him we’re ok with it already and let him tell his black mailers to GFT and do what he was supposed to be doing in the first place

Expand full comment

Ala Seinfeld, "Not that there's anything wrong with that."

Expand full comment

Fer Shur… not that there’s anything wrong with that😕

Expand full comment

2 - that should piss of anyone who worked their tail off to repay or avoid student debt. This lawless administration continues to be the worst ever.

Expand full comment

These asshats are so dumb! Lawlessness goes both ways once you let that genie out of the bottle. I guess this means red states can ignore court rulings that strike down voter ID laws or abortion restrictions. These guys are so power mad that they don't even realize that the guardrails they are disassembling at breakneck speed protect everyone including themselves. They always overplay their hand because they think they will rule forever whenever they get into power. They have no foresight, principles, historical awareness, are mostly sociopaths and don't have an ethical or moral bone in their bodies. Thanks for ending the filibuster on judicial nominations Harry! How'd that work out for you? I never wanted our country to go in this direction, but get ready for banana republic retribution politics.

Expand full comment

"...this means red states can ignore court rulings that strike down voter ID laws or abortion restrictions."

If only. Like Trump's Owner points out, Republicans are incapable of weilding power.

Expand full comment

Or at least fighting back. I dont mind the high road but damn, turning the other cheek only works so long. Then you got to fight. We are at the point, it is fight or lose the country forever. I didnt spend time in the military to lose the country because of a bunch of power hungry, greedy politicians.

Expand full comment

Sigh..... I know. That's why after around 30 years as a Republican I registered unaffiliated when I moved a couple of towns further away from the now lefty infested seacoast last year. Never voting for Susan Collins or her ilk again. I'd rather be kicked in the balls by the D-rats then shanked in the back by the Pubs. Fool me once shame on you, fool me over and over again shame on me.

Expand full comment

Years ago, okay, a decade or so, I concluded that there was no saving the Dem party. (Was it when they struck God from their party platform at the 2008 Convention?)

The only party, therefore, worth saving at that time, was the GOP.

Like you, I’ve lost confidence in the Republican Party as a whole.

I share your sigh.

Expand full comment

The demons and the dem lites.same-o same-o

Expand full comment

I hoid dat!

Expand full comment

Nah. Republicans will take the high road and reach across the isle to their friends on the other side

Expand full comment

And take a knife in the gut. Of course I am not a pubbie and an unindicted class II felon in Illinois.

Expand full comment

I would agree however I believe the Obama administration to be the worst ever. This administration is simply Obama 2.0

Expand full comment

This ozeros third term,thank you v.jarret.

Expand full comment

Shouldn't any student debt forgiveness exclude Affirmative Action students since they didn't belong in college in the first place?

I dare a conservative representative to say that out loud. And while I'm on things our reps will never ask, when is someone going to shout out to Biden, "Mr President, why don't you want to sniff your 7th granddaughter?"

Expand full comment

28 - looks like Disney is trying to set a new record for movie losses with this bomb. The producer heard about their previous bombs. Turned to Bob Iger and said “Hold my Bud Light”.

Expand full comment

Henny Youngman would be so proud of you.

Expand full comment

8 - The Law of the Sea must take precedent, otter wise, charges would be dropped.

Expand full comment

That otter listened to too much Beach Boys music as a Baby.

Expand full comment

Otters are amazing. When I and dear wife had our place on the S. Oregon. Coast , Otter pups would sun themselves on the deck.

Expand full comment

Punny you should say dat.

Expand full comment

POLL: I had to pick "Short People" b/c of ITEM 12. Even with lifts in his fake military boots, Zelensky can't measure up. But he's laughing all the way to the bank.

Expand full comment

Don't give up. I have hoped for 81 years that I would somehow be taller than 5 ft. 2 in. by now. With 4 inch high heels, I was nearly as tall as my dad. Short people got no reason to live. Thanks, Goodrum.

Expand full comment

My mother stood a towering 4-10. My current wife is the same package of dynamite.

Expand full comment

We short folks look up to a lot of folks.

Expand full comment

The Biden presidency could be 39.2 percent worse ?? Name one thing Biden hasn't touched that he hasn't "Fucked Up?" Please, don't give him any ideas either.....

Expand full comment

Biden taking less vacation could only make things worse if he's actually the one in charge. Personally, I hope he takes less vacation since his handlers would have more work to do walking back the things he says and covering for his deterioration.

Expand full comment

Agreed. FJB should only work between the hours of 11:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m. That gives him an after breakfast ice cream cone and a pre-dinner ice cream cone. The most we can hope for is brain freeze.

Expand full comment

yeah, no help to Xiden's admin please.

Expand full comment

Item 3: Congressional hearings should be banned. They are a tool for both parties to appear busy, effective, and helpful without holding anyone accountable. Sounds a lot like the vaccine experience.

Expand full comment

Yes. More proof that Washington should just be moved to Hollywood. They'd cause less trouble there, and California is already destroyed.

Expand full comment

10 - hard to root against the Russians after a line like that!!

Expand full comment

On item 27 it would appear the Secret Service could be considered the Biden family's private security detail. Back in 2018 when Joe was a private citizen and son Hunter was screwing his sister-in-law, widow of his dead brother, the SS helped Hunter out of a tricky situation when the couple had a spat and Hallie threw Hunter's gun in a dumpster close to a school. He called them up and helped clean up the mess. Of course there were no consequences then either.

Expand full comment

I’ve never understood how the adult child of an ex-Vice President is entitled to Secret Service protection. From SS website:

“Who is the Secret Service authorized to protect?

By law, the Secret Service is authorized to protect:

The president, the vice president, (or other individuals next in order of succession to the Office of the President), the president-elect and vice president-elect

The immediate families of the above individuals

Former presidents, their spouses, except when the spouse re-marries

Children of former presidents until age 16

Visiting heads of foreign states or governments and their spouses traveling with them, other distinguished foreign visitors to the United States, and official representatives of the United States performing special missions abroad

Major presidential and vice presidential candidates, and their spouses within 120 days of a general presidential election

Other individuals as designated per Executive Order of the President and

National Special Security Events, when designated as such by the Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security”

Expand full comment

This clusterf&&& in power is spcial ,do you understand peasant?

Expand full comment

The Obamunist expanded that to cover all his coconspirators.

Expand full comment

That's interesting. Is there any documentation on that? Because that would tell us who is involved with the crimes based on who would be considered to be at risk.

Expand full comment

As I recall, right after Benghazi, Obama ordered secret service protection for Rice, Jarrett and others. He didn't do it by executive order, so having difficulty finding a link.

Expand full comment

Item 3 Item15. Trump gave us and himself Chris Wray, a well known liberal, prior to his selection as FBI director. He selected Jeff Sessions to be his first AG. He should of used the Democrats selection criteria for political appointees....spawn of Satan or grandkids of Hitler Youth.

Expand full comment

Trump also stuck us with Mike Pence. The interview yesterday with Tucker Carlson was quite elucidating. One wonders what spirit is talking to Mr. Pence. Clearly it is not the holy one.

Expand full comment

Agree Mark. Pence told Tucker Carlson he is more concerned with Ukraine than the US of A.

Expand full comment

That was a wild interview. I knew Pence was bad, had him as a Governor. Didnt realize how bad. On the other hand, factored in is that the VP has be worse than the President so the President doesnt get snipered. Obama did that with Biden, and Biden, omg, did it with Kackles.

Expand full comment

Cackles, or Cankles?

Expand full comment

Ewwwwww 'eye bleach, eye bleach'

Expand full comment

LOL!!

Expand full comment

One is dumber than dirt. The other is just plain meaner than a biotch wolf in a pepper patch. (Apologies to the mommy wolf.) Cankles has been described as Everyman's Ex-wife.

Expand full comment

They keep a picture of her in every ER to treat Viagra overdoses.

Expand full comment

TJ, the interview was so bad for Pence, I kept thinking of the end of the video game Mortal Kombat...,”Finish Him... “

Expand full comment

Amen

Expand full comment

Amen.

Expand full comment

If you follow The Bible, It speaks of Russia, should they destroy Ukraine, can swing right around and destroy the mid-east, taking Israel in the process thus starting WWIII. We are really that close. For that matter, what about The Biblical 'Four Horsemen?' At least here, we have had some rain, but no wind. Only God's hand will save us now.

Expand full comment

Self righteous prick. When I first heard that thing about him never being in a place with another woman unless his wife was present I knew there was something wrong with him.

Expand full comment

"...never being in a place with another woman unless his wife was present..."

Speaking only for me, I thought that was pretty smart, actually...doesn't mean he wasn't a self-righteous prick, anyway. He's just never had much in the way of a spine.

Expand full comment

At the time, I thought it was smart because there were a lot of rumors of misconduct (anything from sexual harassment to sexual assault, to out and out rape) going round pointed at conservatives mainly. Figured it kept him from getting caught in that trap, but it was worded oddly and now like you, think he just never had a spine.

Expand full comment

Won't it be a kick in the head to realize he was on probation, and that was the reason. They never show the ankle monitors, do they?

Expand full comment

It could be like Clinton, and a little over doing of the big old Bible under each arm.

Expand full comment

Seems that popularity above conservative principles was the guiding rule on these appointments.

Expand full comment

I’m still trying to figure out which appointment Trump made that was brilliant. So far I’m thinking only Richard Grenell.

Expand full comment

18 - California keeps showing there is no depth it won’t sink to.

Expand full comment

Indeed. If you're still raising your kids and you still live in California, that's probably child abuse.

Expand full comment

4 - Christie from the linked article - “ doesn’t mean there aren’t problems at the FBI — there are. But I believe Chris is a guy who can get it fixed and he’s fixed a lot of them already.”

Correct. Wray’s fixed things. He’s a fixer. Justice is fixed like never becoren The fix is in with Wray on the job.

Expand full comment

Voting for "I want my M-TV." That F-word lyric went from slightly controversial to a heresy against the rainbow now...

Expand full comment

Thank you, Don, for digesting and regurgitating massive amounts of zombie propaganda and turning it into beautiful sarcasm to inform me while preserving my barely tenable sanity. You are a lifesaver.

Expand full comment

Forgive me, revmaddog, but the only way I can post a comment from where I am right now and the device I’m on (nature place on phone) is as a Reply to an existing comment, and your comment above is the closest in content to what I’d like to say:

I just have to say again, Don, you are hitting the ball out of the park with every column. Today’s highlights started off with such gems as “Trump/Bukele 2024”, “I’m talking about Wray, not Nehls. I think.”; the Celsius CEO and the Fahrenheit money; the “101st Bitter Klingers”, and so on.

Don is providing not just outstanding political commentary, but today I just have to say, we are also witnessing a writing master at the top of his game.

Thank you for a daily dose of excellence to counteract the plethora of garbage.

Expand full comment