Don't liberal, be happy

As television dies a slow, painful death — hanged by the very cable it thought was its gold mine — I witness that TV commercials now are all DEI with three-word slogans that sound vaguely AI created. In the ads, Lizzo has replaced Kate Upton, perhaps by eating her. Lizzo’s after picture looks like a before.

Dairy Queen’s ads fall in line with this new approach, but its three-word slogan actually plays to its base: Happy Tastes Good.

DQ’s base is rural and happy.

The media used DQ to show Trump was out of touch with America, a rather self-unaware irony. NBC cried, “Trump asks ‘what the hell is a Blizzard’ at Dairy Queen campaign stop in Iowa. The former president appeared unfamiliar with perhaps the most famous item on the fast food chain’s menu.”

Siddown, NBC. Your staff has PhD’s from Oxford.

That a fellow who lives in Mar-a-Lago when he is not in his ornate three-story penthouse in Manhattan even knows there is such a thing as a Dairy Queen is impressive enough for me. He went to one and decided to buy everyone ice cream. He didn’t know what a Blizzard is, so he asked.

The real story is not the Blizzard, but that Democrats and their media cede to conservatives DQ. Happy Tastes Good and so they hate it. They hate a lot of things that taste good especially real meat. Americans loved the Plymouth Hemi ’Cuda and other cheap muscle cars that made every man a Steve McQueen. Democrats banned them through auto insurance mandates, emissions controls and MPG requirements.

30 years later, muscle cars came back — convertibles too.

Now they are replacing them with battery-operated cars with cutoff switches if you go rogue.

Democrats have become a rather unhappy lot. Michael McKenna wrote about it in June.

He said, “For a number of years, academics have developed and examined data that clearly indicates that those Americans who identify politically as liberals are less happy than those who identify as conservative. The quantity and durability of that data are not really in question.

“Increasingly, neither are the reasons for the divergence.

“It appears — and stop me if any of this sounds familiar — that happiness is at least partially about how connected a person is to other humans, particularly through the mechanisms of family, faith and community. Self-proclaimed liberals are less likely than conservatives, on average, to be tied to those three institutions.”

But liberals do connect with other people. And they do have faith — in government. It’s not that I disagree with him, it is that I see something more in their unhappiness.

Liberals today control everything — the schools, the banks, the media, the government, the military, the churches, the Internet and even sports. That they are unhappy shows that power not only corrupts but it never is satisfying. You need more in life. You need God.

I have noticed in my seven decades that the happiest people — what a high school teacher once called happy little morons — are the Christians. I notice the Christians because I have seen more of them than I have Muslims, Hindus and Jews. The more devout, the happier Christians are.

Democrats weren’t always sourpusses. FDR’s campaign song in 1932 was Happy Days Are Here Again.

But 56 years later, they demanded George H.W. Bush stop using Bobby McFerrin’s Don’t Worry, Be Happy song. He switched to This Land Is Your Land. I wrote about that song yesterday. The revelations about Woody Guthrie say so much about our 41st president.

Dukakis did not pick up on Don’t Worry, Be Happy, and lost 40 states to 10. UPI’s post-election report said, “At a time when unemployment was at a 14-year low and inflation about one-third of its 1980 level, Democrat Michael Dukakis simply could not convince the voters that hard times were here or on the way.”

But Bush was a phony and the Gingrich Revolution that gave Republicans control of Congress for the first time in four decades never paid off. The swamp got swampier.

Then came 9/11 and Bush 43 did not fire anyone in the vaunted intelligence community for utterly failing to see it coming.

Instead, Bush and Congress rewarded the intelligence community by expanding their enormous powers to spy on Americans. The failed intelligence community also received a brand, spanking new cabinet department to call their own. The Patriot Act empowered them to do things King George III never imagined.

Obama and Biden have used those powers as well as anti-Mafia and anti-drug cartel laws to squash dissent. The FBI used facial recognition not to catch the criminals who beat Asian Americans but instead to go after Trump supporters. This week, the FBI killed an old disabled man in Utah in his own home, and then displayed the body (covered with a sheet) outdoors for two hours. Fascism? You’re soaking in it.

We still are happy. Our oppressors are not.

CNN’s John King ventured out of Washington to talk to Trump voters. He found them friendly and of good cheer.

King said, “They’re good people . . . They go to church! But they believe things that would break our fact-check machine . . . And they don’t trust us! They think we’re part of the problem!”

The fact-check machine was broken by Russiagate, Hunter’s laptop and covid. Begone, little man. Ivermectin is not horse paste medicine.

King admitted Trump supporters are good people. Can you say that about Antifa? BLM? PeTA? Planned Parenthood? Drag queens? Purple-haired groomers posing as elementary school teachers?

The left is in denial, or rather, the left is trying to convince Americans not to see what is actually there. NYT writer Ross Douthat wrote, “How the Right Turned Radical and the Left Became Depressed.”

The right did not turn radical. The left did, and that has led them to despair.

His essay said, “The America of today is more socially liberal on almost every issue than the America of George W. Bush, more secular, less heteronormative, more diverse in terms of both race and personal identity, more influenced by radical ideas that once belonged to the fringe of academia.

“Unfortunately in finding its heart’s desire the left also seems to have found a certain kind of despair.”

That despair is easily explained. They won but they were wrong — every time. Carbon dioxide is not boiling the Earth. You are not assigned a sex at birth by a doctor. Masks don’t stop a virus.

Conservatives have been powerless to stop this idiocracy from taking over. Trump took on the deep state and lost. We should feel gloom, despair, agony, deep dark depression, and excessive misery. Instead, we are happy because we know how it all ends and it does not end with Hitler or Stalin or Obama or Soros winning.

We know this and are happy — and happy tastes good.