Highlights of the week

Woody Woodpecker had a Saturday morning show in the 1970s, but in 1957-1958, Woody had a Thursday afternoon show on ABC in the Mickey Mouse Club slot. I guess the Mouseketeers needed time off now and then.

ITEM 1: Bobby Kennedy Jr. entered the presidential race, nearly 60 years after the assassination of his uncle and 55 years after the assassination of his father. I respect his courage.

His politics? He’s a Democrat.

Scott Johnson of Power Line said, “As a liberal St. Paul high school student in 1968 I preferred McCarthy to Kennedy. Indeed, I canvassed in Wisconsin for McCarthy before LBJ withdrew. In 2024, as a conservative Republican, I prefer Kennedy to Biden (or Newsom, for that matter).”

He just doesn’t get it. If you vote for one Democrat, you vote for them all. Manchin is interchangeable with Bernie Sanders because both men voted for the Green New Deal — which was labeled the Inflation Reduction Act.

ITEM 2: CBS reported, “Police in Pleasanton, California, on Wednesday identified the 26-year-old man working as a Home Depot security guard who died after being shot by an alleged shoplifter at the store Tuesday as well as the suspects who were arrested with a toddler in their vehicle.”

The victim was Blake Mohs.

The story said, “Friends of Mohs said he was one of the nicest people you'd ever meet. He was active with the Boy Scouts his entire life and became an Eagle Scout at the age of 14. More recently volunteered with the Cub Scouts on the weekends.

“He met his fiancé at a scouting camp near the Russian River where they were both camp counselors. Their summer wedding was going to be held at the camp.”

Sad ending. The blood is on the hands of those voters in California who decided to de-criminalize shoplifting and other forms of theft.

White victim, black suspects. Expect a mostly peaceful protest to destroy the town.

Oh, who am I kidding?

ITEM 3: The Daily Mail reported, “Six-year-old has bullet fragments lodged in her cheek after neighbor shot at her and her parents when basketball rolled into his yard — man is still on the run after violent reaction.”

Missus Horvath just kept the ball.

ITEM 4: Ars Technica whined, “Twitter quietly edited its hateful conduct policy to drop transgender protections.”

Free speech ain’t always pleasant, darling, but it was what the Lord gave us. Why should trannies be off limits for criticism and not President Trump?

Along those lines, Mashable said, “Dozens of regional LGBTQ community centers are deactivating their Twitter accounts today, decrying recent policy changes despite the rise of hate speech and calling on the app to do more to protect its users.

“The announcement came from CenterLink, an international nonprofit network of more than 325 LGBTQ organizations, many of which will also be leaving the platform.”

Here’s your ball. Go home. We don’t want your Rainbow Fascism.

ITEM 5: Legal Insurrection reported, “Missouri State U To Stop Discriminating Against White Males For ‘Business Boot Camp’ After Equal Protection Project Complaint.”

No white boys allowed?

White boys died for the 13th, 14th and 15th amendments which protect women’s rights and minority rights. America needs a White Boys Appreciation Day. Not for us white boys. We didn’t fight that war. But we need to remind these sexists and bigots of the sacrifices made in the Civil War by those who did not benefit from the excursion.

ITEM 6: The Daily Mail provided the laugh of the day with, “The Manhattan district attorney's attempt to block a former prosecutor from testifying in Congress about efforts to prosecute Donald Trump failed on Wednesday, with a judge ruling that Mark Pomerantz could be called to testify.

“Pomerantz worked for years on the Trump investigation, but left the job after clashing with Alvin Bragg, the district attorney, over the direction of the case.”

Drumroll.

The judge said, “Mr. Pomerantz must appear for the congressional deposition. No one is above the law.”

Rimshot.

ITEM 7: The Daily Mail reported, “Pennsylvania Senator John Fetterman returned to the Senate this week with a frightening and concerning first speech after nearly two full months away for clinical depression.

“The Democrat took a step back from his role in mid-February and finally came back Wednesday to his position with a choppy first speech.

“During a Senate Agriculture Committee’s Subcommittee on Food and Nutrition, Specialty Crops, Organics and Research meeting, the recovering lawmaker raised eyebrows with his speech pattern.

“At one point, social media users said it was hard to understand what he was saying, while others said it felt like watching an SNL skit.”

Now for today’s bonus poll.

I am no expert, but I do not believe clinical depression slurs your speech.

ITEM 7: Townhall reported, “Rep. Rosa DeLauro (D-CT) highlights the vital work that Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg is doing to ensure that ‘female dummies’ are used in vehicle crash testing ‘to fight the gender inequity among . . . crash victims.’”

A reader added, “If they are looking for female dummies, they don’t have far to look.”

Twice as many men die in car crashes than women. Welcome to equity, ladies.

ITEM 9: The Daily Mail reported, “IRS whistleblower claims he has PROOF the Biden administration has thwarted the criminal investigation into Hunter and has engaged in ‘preferential treatment and politics.’”

He also has proof of crimes by the Clintons, but he has heard of Arkancide.

ITEM 10: Trending Politics reported, “On Wednesday, Florida lawmakers passed a bill supported by Governor Ron DeSantis, which will allow for the death penalty to be imposed on individuals convicted of sexually abusing children.

“HB 1297, otherwise known as the Capital Sexual Battery law, provides the death penalty for certain child sexual offenders. Separate death penalty proceedings are required, with a jury making findings and recommendations on whether the defendant should be sentenced to life imprisonment without parole or to death.”

Hey, West Virginia Legislature, have I got a bill for you . . .

ITEM 11: The New York Post ratted on LeBron James.

It said, “LeBron James still has verified Twitter checkmark after slamming platform’s Blue service.”

I guess that Go Fund Me for the $8 a month worked.

Ben Stiller virtue signaled, “No blue check, still feel like me.”

Ah, when they were free he made sure he had one. They all did. They are not virtuous. They are cheap.

ITEM 12: Variety reported, “BuzzFeed News Is Shutting Down, Company Laying Off 180 Staffers.”

BuzzFeed broke the Russiagate story.

Enjoy the Trumpenfreude. Maybe the FBI will hire them to work for the bureau directly.

Gizmodo reported, “The news outlet Insider announced to staff via email Thursday morning that the company lay off 10% of its workforce, including staff writers.”

Another lib site is tanking. Another set of devils are silenced.

Bloomberg reported, “Disney Is Set to Eliminate Thousands of Jobs Starting Next Week.”

But hey, its support of groomers had nothing to do with its collapse.

ITEM 13: Vivek Ramaswamy tweeted, “Here’s how we protect Taiwan without going to war with China: open a branch of the NRA in Taiwan, put an AR-15 in the hands of every family, and train them how to use it. That’ll give Xi Jinping a taste of American exceptionalism.”

Chairman Xi will just have to buy off Taiwan’s politicians like he does every other country.

ITEM 14: NBC reported, “Charges have been dropped against Alec Baldwin in the fatal shooting of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins on the set of his Western movie Rust after new facts surfaced in recent days, officials said Thursday.

Did those new facts come in cash, check or money order?

ITEM 15: AP reported, “NATO chief Jens Stoltenberg defiantly declared Thursday that Ukraine’s rightful place is in the military alliance and pledged more support for the country on his first visit to Kyiv since Russia’s invasion just over a year ago.”

NATO isn’t a defense pact. It is a money machine. Stoltenberg is just a bagman.

ITEM 16: The Epoch Times reported, “Civil Rights Complaint Filed Against Anheuser-Busch for Racist and Sexist Hiring.”

Sexist? Well, it did hire a man to be its spokeswoman . . .

ITEM 17: Breitbart reported, “Rep. Ralph Norman (R-SC) told Breitbart News in an exclusive interview on Thursday that the Republican debt ceiling is a ‘step in the right direction.’”

A step in the right direction? We are thousands of miles away from where we should be.

A reader unloaded: “$130 billion in cuts versus $1.5 trillion increase in the debt ceiling.

“$78 billion cut is coming from the IRS repeal.

“Whoopeedoo.

“1% of $1.5 trillion is $150 billion.

“That’s not even a drop in the bucket, it’s a rounding error.”

ITEM 18: HeyJackass! reported Chicago enjoyed a summery weekend a week ago.

You know what that means.

13 shot and killed and another 31 wounded.

ITEM 19: The Washington Post click-baited, “D.C. U.S. attorney declined to prosecute 67% of those arrested.” It was based on reporting by a Substacker a month ago.

Joe Friday reported on March 14, “One possible explanation for this trend could be if the USAO had been losing a lot of weak cases that it was “presenting” and had cut back on those weak cases in recent years to focus on “winning” the important ones. However, there hasn’t been a massive increase in the % of cases that end in a guilty plea or verdict (especially compared to the much larger increase in declinations). So that possible explanation doesn’t really hold water.”

So a month before the Jeff Bezos Post made the excuse, a Substacker debunked it.

Crime pays — Democrats.

ITEM 20: David Glasser reported, “A Florida State University criminology professor who recently left his job amid accusations that he falsified data to make racism look worse than it is has raised the specter of academic research fraud across the board.

“It appears Professor Eric Stewart faked results in at least six studies about American crime, and some have observed his alleged misconduct is not an isolated example.”

Professors go where the money is. Black victimhood sells. Climate change too.

The story also said, “Over 62% of academic papers on psychology and 39% on economics are non-replicable, meaning there is no way for researchers to definitively verify or falsify results of these studies, according to the New York Post.”

Governments fund outcomes, not science.

ITEM 21: CNBC reported, “Walmart sells plus-size clothing brand Eloquii, offloading its third digital brand this year.”

Plus size?

There goes its customer base.

ITEM 22: The New York Post reported, “Cops delivered our pizza — after arresting delivery man: shocked couple.”

That was in England. In NYC, the pizza man would be out of jail so fast, he’d still deliver within 20 minutes.

ITEM 23: Fox reported, “Illegal aliens who are LGBTQ ‘may not be detained’ under new Democrat bill.”

Hollywood and Silicon Valley want their boy toys to be illegals because they are easier to abuse because they cannot run to the cops for fear of deportation.

ITEM 24: Vox reported that Meta canned 4,000 employees.

Zuckerberg said, “We’re in a different world.”

Wasn’t that the point of turning Facebook into Meta — to make a different world?

ITEM 25: The New York Times giggled, “SpaceX’s Starship rocket exploded on Thursday, minutes after lifting off from a launchpad in South Texas.”

How many rockets did NASA blow up on its way to putting a man on the moon?

National Geographic nailed it, reporting, “It was a historic moment, nonetheless, the successful launch of the largest and most powerful rocket ever to fly. The crowds of thousands heard—and felt—from five miles away, the titanic thunder of dozens of the 394-foot-tall rocket’s 33 engines firing at once.

“No one seemed disappointed, even SpaceX, which lauded the fact it took off at all and cleared the launchpad, the only piece of hardware that isn’t considered expendable. The cheers from the crowds gathered on beaches east of Brownsville were responding to a promise from SpaceX founder Elon Musk.

“‘Success maybe,’ he predicted of the flight attempt last week on Twitter. ‘Excitement guaranteed.’”

The rockets represent the best technology of our generation. A century from now they will look like Model T’s.

ITEM 26: Joe Cunningham reported, “Well, It Looks Like Russia Accidentally Bombed Itself on Thursday.”

Good thing Vlad wasn’t using nukes.

ITEM 27: The Decider reported, “Kamala Harris Draws Attention After Being Grilled By 10-Year-Old Reporter on Jennifer Hudson Show: ‘She’s So Unserious.’”

Democrats went from Cankles (Hillary) to Cackles.

ITEM 28: Racist liberals are attacking Justice Clarence Thomas again, this time because he inherited some property in Liberty County, Georgia.

Orrin Hatch reminded us of what he said at his confirmation hearing 32 years ago, “I'd rather die than withdraw. If they're going to kill me, they're going to kill me.”

Live free or die. The man lives up to the name of his hometown county.

ITEM 29: Benny Johnson tweeted, “Bud Light VP of Marketing Alissa Heinerscheid has taken a leave of absence amid backlash from the Dylan Mulvaney controversy.”

Never concede on social issues. If they weren’t important, Democrats would not fight tooth and tong for them.

FINALLY, Glenn K. Beaton’s new book High Attitude: How Woke Liberals Ruined Aspen is out. I could not care less about Aspen, Colorado, but it is a hilarious take on the history of what is now a pretentious colony of batshit crazies.

Space limits forced me to truncate Bud Light.