Govern like a king

This weekend’s coronation of King Charles III and Queen Camilla was magnificent. I especially enjoyed the part where they both ate Imperial margarine and crowns popped on their heads. The company got its money’s worth for the product placement, and the fee helped defray the cost of the majesty and pageantry.

Republicans can learn from the spectacle to put on a good show to distract attention as they dismantle the federal government. Instead of whining about the deep state, silently torpedo it. President Trump was good at many, many things but the deep state played him like a Williams sister does a tennis ball because he stupidly trusted the press to be fair. It is not. It is an arm of the deep state.

Trump thought Andrew McCarthy and the rest would handle and condemn Obama for using the FBI to spy on The Donald. Wrong.

He thought the press would expose Russiagate as a coverup of the spying. Wrong.

He thought the press would praise the peace and prosperity he brought. Wrong.

My advice is shut up about the deep state. Be nice to it — as you shove 23 blades in it. As Sun Tzu said, “Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.”

Easier said than done? Watch me.

First, get elected. Plenty of online experts offer plenty of free advice. They are all smarter than me, so I suggest the nominee take their often contradictory advice.

Second, trust no one in Washington. Mitch McConnell gave President Trump bad advice, putting termites in the Cabinet starting with Jeff Sessions. The best Cabinet secretary was Betsy DeVos, his education secretary. She did well because she was an outsider who refused to let the dogs in civil service wag her.

The new president in 2025 must bring in outsiders. Republicans have dozens of governors, attorneys general and other state officers who could be brought in to Washington to run the Department of Transportation and the like. I mention DOT because it must be worth something otherwise McConnell’s wife and Biden’s token gay would not have wanted the post.

The two most important Cabinet officials are the attorney general and commerce secretary. Eric Holder was right. The AG should be the president’s wing man. It would help if the next president if he had a kid brother with a law degree who admires him and would do anything for him.

The commerce secretary should be the president’s best friend because much of the government will be cut. Cabinet officers will be under orders to reduce their departments to small bureaus that will be moved to Commerce.

DOT, Education, Energy, EPA, Homeland Security, HUD and Labor are unnecessary evils. The states can handle these duties. Small bureaus of 100 or so people can coordinate with the states and dole out the money such as rent subsidies for the impoverished and the grifters.

To empower the secretaries to do this, the president needs to use the $40 trillion national debt (or whatever the number is today) to declare a national emergency. A Republican Congress should give him the ability to freeze civil service hiring and to eliminate civil service positions.

Grants for academia, Planned Parenthood and any other liberal tax-exempt group should be stopped. Cancel subscriptions to the Washington Post.

The FBI and CIA will batten down the hatches. The new president will have to poke them a few times to see what and where those hatches are. A frontal attack would be a disaster. Patience is a virtue. Time will dictate the tactic to take.

Third, stop publication of the Federal Register. Before becoming law, all civil service regulations — promulgations to use the jargon — must be published in the Federal Register. So don’t publish it. This will wreak havoc and lead to lawsuits and the like. Tough. As the chief of the executive branch of government, the president is the publisher. A district court judge can enjoin government action but he cannot force publication, especially with his new powers under the national budget emergency. If required by some law, publish a few blank pages.

Shrinking the bureaucracy and unplugging its unconstitutional power of promulgation are the best ways to Make America Great Again because those actions return power to the people — and the states.

Fourth, appoint a Federal Reserve chairman who will quit printing money. Surely there is a state treasurer or state auditor or state comptroller who would love to say stop the presses. (I actually got to say that once at the Wall Street Journal in Cleveland.)

Fifth, fire the entire Joint Chiefs of Staff. They are all little Milleys. He once said, “I’ve read Karl Marx. I’ve read Lenin. That doesn’t make me a communist.” True because he already was a communist before he read them. If he read Mein Kampf, everyone would assume he was a Nazi.

The new defense secretary should order all the military academies to stand down. America needs the elimination of courses on sociology, CRT, DEI and the rest of the courses not related to core subjects and the military. War colleges need a house cleaning as well.

Sixth, kick the enemy press out of the White House. The president-elect’s communications person should send the New York Times and Washington Post (which is owned by Jeff Bezos) lengthy lists of errors they have made in the past 10 years and request — not demand — corrections that begin on Page One and continue prominently displayed inside.

NYT and the Bezos Post will give some bullshit interpretation of the First Amendment and refuse the request. The president should use that as a pretense for pulling their press privileges. The legal battle will amuse everyone and serve as a great distraction.

Seventh, hold formal Cabinet meetings at the White House but hold the real ones at Camp David on the weekends. Invite the secretaries to visit and then hand them slates and chalk to communicate because the assumption must be that every conversation is recorded by the FBI, CIA or someone else working for the Democrat Party. Remember, it is not paranoia if every one really is out to get you.

Eighth, grant clemency for time served to the January 6 dissidents. Withhold the pardons because you need to determine whether they were railroaded. To that end, a special counsel must be appointed. This will allow criminal investigations of congressmen, law enforcement heads and judges involved in the case. Make them hire lawyers and hope that they will be bankrupted just as they did General Flynn. Only then should the president grant pardons.

The deep state undermines our republic because it always gets away with its crimes. The next president must end that.

But again, before all this is done, the nominee must win the election.

I caution readers on the polls, which suddenly turned south on Biden. The purpose of the polls is not to gauge public opinion but to shape it. Democrats want to dump Biden in favor of the equally retarded Kamala Harris. Michelle Obama is still too busy trying to figure out what to do with that gift.

Finally, while all this is going on, the president must pretend that all he is doing is playing president. King George III had his Lord North but the king decided, not the prime minister. In chaos there is power; otherwise Democrats would not be creating it.

The next Republican president must be the chaotic king who takes on the deep state with stealth.